Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah on Reclaiming African Sexual Traditions for Modern Pleasure
In a groundbreaking exploration of sexuality, Ghanaian writer Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah delves into the rich tapestry of African rites and rituals to propose new models of sexual freedom. Her latest book, Seeking Sexual Freedom: African Rites, Rituals and Sankofa in the Bedroom, builds on her earlier work, The Sex Lives of African Women, by unearthing forgotten customs that emphasize openness, care, and pleasure.
Rediscovering Rites of Passage
Sekyiamah's journey began with chronicling contemporary sexual practices, but she has since expanded into the pre-modern past. She asks provocative questions: "Are our Indigenous religions more expansive than the Abrahamic faiths we predominantly practise today? Can we go back to the best of our traditional practices, and use that knowledge as a foundation?" For many, rites of passage have been shrouded in silence, but Sekyiamah spent years interviewing women across Africa and the diaspora to bring these stories to light.
One key example is the Ghanaian tradition of Dipo, which ushers young girls into womanhood at puberty. Sekyiamah contrasts her own experience—a brief talk from her mother about avoiding pregnancy—with the elaborate Dipo ceremonies she observed near Accra. Here, girls undergo training in hygiene, wear beads, and participate in symbolic performances, highlighting a community-based approach to sexual education.
The Role of Sex Aunties in Uganda
In Uganda, Sekyiamah discovered the concept of the ssenga, or sex auntie, among the Baganda people. This trusted female relative is tasked with explicitly teaching nieces about sex and preparing them for womanhood. "I really love the idea of a sex auntie," Sekyiamah says, "because a lot of us grew up in the diaspora with mothers who are very conservative and say very little, if anything, about sex. Just imagine, if everyone had a sex auntie." She shares anecdotes of aunties encouraging open discussions about bodies and pleasure, a radical departure from the shame often associated with sexuality.
Body Positivity and Pleasure Practices
Sekyiamah's research also uncovers practices like pulling, where Baganda girls are taught to extend their labia, believed to enhance sexual pleasure. While this may seem controversial, Sekyiamah notes it fosters familiarity with genitalia and body positivity. "How many of us, even now, know what our own genitalia look like? We don't ever look," she reflects. This ties into the Ghanaian concept of Sankofa—going back to fetch the good from the past—which underpins her book's thesis.
Her work challenges stereotypes, such as the automatic association of Africa with female genital mutilation, by showcasing diverse traditions that prioritize love and care. Sekyiamah's forensic focus is grounded in a desire to empower women and girls, ensuring they are not robbed of joy and pleasure in their bodies.
A Foundation for Sexual Freedom
Through examples of women who have bloomed into healthy relationships with their sexuality, Sekyiamah argues that these traditions provide a valuable base for modern sexual education. "I just want to provide an opportunity to do things differently," she says. "We are not starting from nowhere—we are starting from a base." Her book, published by Dialogue Books in the UK and Atria Books in the US, offers a compelling call to harness historical wisdom for contemporary well-being.
