For many in the UK, the default formula for an evening's entertainment is well-worn: dinner and drinks, often culminating in a fuzzy head the next morning. But a growing movement, backed by happiness science, suggests we can find more joy and connection by reimagining what a night out can be.
Rethinking Fun: From Passive Consumption to Active Engagement
"It's nice to have a night out that doesn't revolve around drinking," is a sentiment echoed in creative spaces like lino printing workshops, where the focus shifts from wine to crafting intricate designs. This represents a conscious move away from passive consumption—like watching TV or a film—towards active, challenging experiences that research indicates deliver greater satisfaction.
Dr Michael Plant, a research fellow at the University of Oxford's Wellbeing Research Centre, highlights a common pitfall known as 'miswanting'—where we mistakenly pursue things we think will make us happy. "We're often wrong about what will make us happy," he says, which is why trying something new can lead to pleasant surprises.
Holistic health coach Sally Dibden advises starting by identifying the feeling you want from your evening. "Do I want to feel more energised? More connected? Calmer?" she suggests asking. The answer can guide your choice, whether that's seeking in-person connection after a day working from home or, conversely, finding solitude if your social battery is depleted.
The Science of a Memorable Evening
Behavioural scientist Jon Levy proposes a crucial shift in perspective. He cites game co-creator Elan Lee, who observed that successful games aren't just 'fun'; they "make the players fun." Levy argues that passive fun is less rewarding than activities where we invest effort. He points to the 'IKEA effect'—where we value furniture more after assembling it—as a principle that applies to our leisure time.
This is where concepts like karaoke come in. "When we are in a vulnerable state, like when singing karaoke, it leads to a higher level of trust and connection," Levy explains. The act of stepping out of your comfort zone, perhaps attempting a challenging song, can be a growth experience that transforms a mundane week.
For those daunted by public performance, Gillian Sandstrom, a professor in the psychology of kindness at the University of Sussex, recommends revisiting childhood joys. "There's something freeing about allowing yourself to not be good at it and do it anyway—uncoupling achievement from enjoyment," she notes.
Connection, Nature and the Beauty of Imperfection
Social interaction remains a cornerstone of wellbeing. Sandstrom's research underscores the value of diverse social connections, including 'weak tie' interactions with strangers. These brief, unexpected exchanges—like a shared moment over a lino print—can significantly boost happiness.
Furthermore, Dr Dan Weijers, co-editor of the International Journal of Wellbeing, advocates incorporating nature. "Combine what we know about the benefits of exercise and socialising, and we get a compelling case for doing things with others outdoors," he says. Holli-Anne Passmore of Concordia University of Edmonton adds that even noticing nature on your journey out can enhance feelings of connectedness and elevation.
Critically, experts warn against chasing perfection. Meik Wiking of the Happiness Research Institute recalls 'The Great Sausage Disaster of 2015' as a night that was memorable precisely because it went wrong. Dibden agrees: "'Perfect' doesn't exist." Dr Plant recommends treating your night out as an experiment—a chance to either have a good time or learn what you don't enjoy, ready to try something else next time.
The ultimate goal is to design evenings that add balance, foster connection, and provide a sense of growth, moving beyond the predictable to discover what truly enriches our lives.
